Postmark May 15, 1899

Monday

My Dear Nellie

You should see the long face this am as you term it.

Nellie it’s the hardest think for me to realize that you realy love me & that you will marry me. I don’t know why I feel this way about it. Then too yesterday caused me to believe more strangely that things are not as they once were. I can well remember at one time had I been stranded at your house without conveyance you wouldn’t have thought of going away and leaving me as you did yesterday & several things here of late sustains my ideas as to your love not being what it should be for me. All this yesterday because I didn’t have a horse & buggy to carry you. You know well had I my own team I’d never said one word about not going but circumstances of which I explained to you were such that I was without a team & that was what I had to face. Now Darling you know I wanted my own horse & buggy. You know me well enough to know I’d be glad to carry you any where or rather have you go with me but I couldn’t have just what I wanted & I am to suffer for it.

Do you ever think that during life there will be lots we want we can’t get!!

Just think of it!! Then would you leave me knowing I couldn’t merely because you wanted to go & had said you were going as you gave that for your biggest reason after returning home that you had told me you were going & that you meant to go whether or not. You wrote me one letter & said you were willful but that you could control it & not let it ever come between us. I often want things that I can’t get & can say yesterday I wanted a horse & buggy but couldn’t get it.

Now I’l have the blues until I see you & hear from you but Nellie I love you. I love you true. There isn’t a doubt & if I felt that I would always have every thing & any thing you might wish I might not feel as I do to day but might feel as though you loved me true too.

There is another thing you always speak of my looking so gloomy at times. Please get the idea from your mind that it is because I’m with you for I love & love to be with you.

Write me a long good letter & if you come Tuesday or Wednesday bring it if not mail it. I’ll get Thursday. It seems long off but guess you’ll have your way.

Your broken hearted boy

Glass